Thursday, May 2, 2019. I think this day has become more impactful than the day I was officially divorced. I awoke feeling ill, stuffy nose, scratchy throat, etc. Pretty unusual as I was feeling perfectly fine the day prior. As I approached the “Meat Grinder”, a comical nickname given by Employees referencing our place of Employment, something felt different.

“There are several things happening in the area, none which are a direct reflection of you or your work. Due to some budget cuts, your position is being eliminated.” I listened as my General Manager, Director Of Human Resources, and Senior Vice President Of Operations detailed my removal.

Calm, sense of calm overwhelmed me. Dramatic to the core, I have many plans for myself to not be financially stable, I just knew I would burst into tears, and pass out from stress. Not one tear fell as I signed my “Separation Agreement”. Ironically enough, I had travel plans the next day, and had tons to do to prepare. I’m still in disbelief of how peaceful I’d become during the process, and how swiftly I moved forward. No resistance, no rage, no disappointment, just an understanding between me and God.

God has been working on me and my sense of “Control” for a very long time. Every component of my life I need a level of reassurance, that would quite often contradict my faith. The experience I had on that gloomy turned sunny Thursday afternoon, was life changing and forced me to enter into my “Shifting Season”.

 Suffering a loss of any kind gives you an incredible resilience. During this time of reflection, I was able to connect a few things that are typically cloudy, for this I am grateful:

1.     Learn your relationship with money, understand how that may need to change.

2.     Controlling obsessively, can literally bring physical damage to you, when you lose the ability to control.

3.     Determination should be an internal war, fight hard for you, and your outcome, not others.

4.     Faith is intended to be tested, how you view it during those tests, define your relationship with God.

Check it and correct it.  

My goal is to continue to identify the mindsets I need to unlearn, and actively change or challenge them.

18 determined days later, not only am I employed, but employed in double capacity. I get to work on passion projects, and still dip my toe in the Corporate world for bit longer. Many people I know told me this was God’s sign for me to focus wholeheartedly on Genuine Gemini, which is indeed happening. 

Genuine Gemini Goal:

To relinquish control more and allow room for failure, growth, and change.

Be Love,

Brittney “Genuine Gemini’ Baker